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Monday, April 20, 2009

Testosterone Trio



See those 3 up there?
Yep.
They have it.
The disease.


What disease?
The "Closereplaceitus"
It's a sad disease.
Really.
I am thinking of starting a telethon.


The disease consists of not being able to replace a toilet paper roll on the empty roller.
I have seen them stuggle with this.
So very sad.
It's as if they are trying to figure out the theory of relativity when it comes to replacing the roll.


Of course, all three also suffer from being able to open a drawer, cabinet or door but not close it.
Bobster is the worse.
He has the disease bad.
I don't know how much time he has left.
The other two are young so there is some time left
BUT
Bobster...
He's so far gone, I don't have much hope.


Example: Just tonight.
He went to get a shower
BUT
first grabbed clean underwear.
In his drawer.
About 30 minutes later as he was done & downstairs I approached the bedroom with the fear that a symptom would rear it's ugly head in my direction.
I was right.
There it was.
Bobster's underwear drawer.
OPEN!
I gasped
&
thought to myself
"He needs help."
Not wanting to drawer attention to this symptom I closed the drawer.
I was afraid Bobster would be embarrased that his arms are so weak he couldn't close his own underwear drawer.
Let's keep it between just us.


Then we have TimBob.
He removed all his clothes from the cabinet in his room.
When I entered the room I noticed the clothes scattered on the floor.
Obviously he had a seizure that caused the clothes to scatter around.
I didn't say anything for a few hours
BUT
hoping for the best I told him.
He managed to clean it up.
He was weak, hungry and ready to pass out from folding the clothes & putting them back
BUT
He pulled through.
Thank God,he's only 15.


The 10 year old has a bad arm.
He can only carry a paintball gun in the one arm, rendering the other one useless to carry the trashbag.
Have no fear.
Not wanting him to lose complete use of the other arm, I gave him all the encouragement he could handle when I handed him the trash bag.
He managed to get it in the dumpster.
Tad out of breath
BUT
He rested afterwards
&
It looks like he will live.
Thank God!


I need your support my loyal readers.
It appears the men in my family only have enough strength to work the remote control.
Are you family members suffering the same disease?
Tell me.
Got any pointers to make this time in our lives more pleasant?
Give them to me!


Woops out!

4 comments:

Eve

My husband only suffers mild symptoms, but I'm a ruthless mocker of the ‘disease’.
The other night I folded clothes, after they had been lying on the bed, and left the room to put them away. I came back to find that my husband had actually managed to move the dryer sheet an entire 12 inches, from the bed to the table, and then had crawled into the bed.
I thought it was a bit odd that he made an effort to move the dryer sheet out of his way, but not to walk the ‘whole’ 4 feet to put it into the garbage can, so I decided to attempt it myself. I lifted that sheet and a surprised groan flew from my lips as I struggled to keep myself from falling over from the immense weight of it. My husband looked up and I confessed that I understood the extreme difficulty he must have faced to even move it a foot, but that I was feeling up to the challenge. I barely managed it, but I did in fact make it all the way to the garbage!

... he just chuckled.

Lissa Ballard

OMG this is hilarious.... Yes, Kevin definately has the door closeritis problem. He can get a mug for his coffee, a plate for a snack, a fork for said snack, a glass for tea... anything - including the snack and the ONLY drawer or door that gets closed is the fridge and that's cause it does it on it's own...

Sad isn't it? They are so muscular, showing off those biceps and pec whenever possible. Such a shame they are only for show...

I feel your pain!

nelsontwinsmom

I think we as mothers of boys owe it to their future wives to cure them of this horrible ailment. Even if we have to beat them senseless with said uncloseable drawer to do it. After all we are only trying to be helpful.

Anonymous

OMG...that was so funny. My husband has a form of the disease too. It's sad really, but we have to be strong for them because how would they be able to survive without us? :)