Not happy!!

I want to cry.

Yep.

Big wails.

I have the lung power to do it.

Why you wonder?

Well I was leaving this morning.

Camera in my bag.

BOOM!

Bag hit the ground.

Of course it did.

That was the type of day I was having.

Got in the car.

Inspected the camera.

It's now broken.

Yeppers.

My Olympus Digi is broken.

The zoom no longer works.

Have to see if I can get it fixed.

Until then,

No camera.

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

Thursday Thankfuls

I am thankful for the following people who are always in my life (guess they would be, they are my family)

1st up: The Grandpop.....Look @ that concentration. Hmm, wonder what's in there? Notice the farmers tan on his arm...you can see where his watch was. Stylish, no?

The Nana....she had no idea this pic was being taken. She will tell me to take it down b/c she looks terrible...don't listen to her. She will tell you all kinds of things about me to make me take down the pic, again down listen to her. She lies. It's very sad.

And the aunt Erie. She will not tell me to take this down. She will say "hmm...Fabu pic of me" She will be right!

I want my family to know that I love them all & appreciate them for all they do.
Even if I don't show it a lot.


Late!

Guess it wasn't what I thought

Just had my feelings hurt.
Big Time.
Think a friendship is broken.
Very upset.


Not saying some of it isn't my fault
BUT
Wish someone was a little more forthcoming in their feelings than letting me believe something was one thing when it wasn't.

Um....

Today is the the viewing for Michael Jackson.
It's taking place at the Staples Center in L.A.
A state that is bankrupt. Has nooooo money.

So, the Staples Center is being used.
Basically an entire police force is being used for crowd control. (so criminals ,feel free to run amok in LA!)
Not to mention other employees that will be there.

Is all the necessary?

Really, don't get me wrong. I feel sorry for the Jackson family (minus Joe Jackson, he's a putz!). They lost a son, a child. I couldn't get over that if it were to happen. Michael was young...50...almost 51. I feel sorry for his children. They lost the only parent they know, at such young ages.

Do I think the Jackson family should have made tickets to his viewing a lottery?
Do I think they should allow anyone who can get a ticket to view him?
NO!

I understand that Jackson was a pop icon.
I like some of his songs.
I understand he did a lot of good in this world.
I also understand he had child molestation counts against him that were settled "out of court."

What I don't understand is why the spectactle?
Did Ed McMahon get this?
Did Farrah?
How about Karl Malden?

No.
They were viewed, buried & put to rest.
End of story.

Death isn't your final show, you final star.

I think that having this Jackson viewing is a circus for all of us to watch.
Let the man rest.

Honestly, I don't care who you are, I never want to go to viewings.
Ever.
I do go but hate every minute at them.

I just feel that this is a lot of money going towards something that the world can do with out.
Did Ronald Reagan get this fanfar when he died?
No.
Did Ray Charles?
How about our local news reporter, Gary Papa?
He was an icon to the Philadelphia area yet his family did it privately.

If you are a fan of MJ & agree with this viewing, great.
I respect your views.
If you agree with me, awesome, if you don't, so be it.

So I will keep the Jackson family in my prayers that they are able to get thru their grief.
I just still wonder if perhaps all this $$$ being spent today on this "circus of a viewing" couldn't have been donated to one of the charities Michael supported & his family had a ceremony for themselves & friends. No fans.

Late!

Ever just feel inadequate

I have been trying really hard to keep my blog upbeat, kicky, fun.
Sometimes, it just doesn't work out that way.


I have just been having a lot of sad days lately.
My dr. has increased my happy medicine for one week out of the month to see if that helps with things
BUT
between the nasty weather the South Jersey region has been experiencing & my own personal problems it has taken it's toll.


I just feel inadequate in a lot of aspects of my life.
Am I a good person?
I thought I was until today when someone accused me of cheating & lying to them.
I didn't do either.
I never would.


Am I a good homemaker?
I have dust balls the size of Texas in all the bedrooms & my bathroom floor needs to be moped for some time now.


Am I a decent financial analysis person?
Ha!
Ask me about my bills, rent & car payments & I can tell you the first names of the bill collectors who call.


Do I feel like a failure as a parent?
Yep.
I know my little guy is only 2 & a lot has to do with that age
BUT
It doesn't help that I have lost my temper with him or I try different types of discipline & it's not working.
I am more laxed about things then some people I know.
Guess I should be on top of it.


Do I want to get out of bed in the morning?
Not particulary.
I do, obviously, but if I could bury my head & sleep away my problems I would


This isn't meant to be a "pity" post.
Just a post to vent.
The lady who accused me of cheating & lying to her really upset me.
I don't do either.
I like to think I am a pretty nice person who tries to help people.
Yes, I can be a snotty bitch
BUT
a liar & a cheat?
NO!


I have rambled on enough.
If you have gotten this far, pat yourself on the back & let me know.
I will send you a congrats card for reading so far down.


Late!

Philadelphia Mourns

The Philadelphia are is mourning the loss of another great guy.
Gary Papa, Sportscaster, of Action News, Channel 6 passed away today,
He had been battling prostrate cancer since 2004.


I grew up watching Gary Papa on the news.
I was an adult before I realized there were other sports casters & news channels out there.


Gary had a great personality & a warmth that exuded from the screen.


My prayers are with Gary's family.
Gary, you will be missed!!!

AAAAWWW

Know what he did?
Friday night he went over the garage.
When he got home he had a bag.
Thought he got himself something to eat.


Nope.


Inside was a box of Tastykakes & a card.
For me.
A card because he was thinking of me.


That's why I love him.
<3



Woops out!

Makes Me Happy Wednesday

Pumpkins. Fall is on the way. Took this pic last year at the pumpkin patch. So fun!
The heat & humidity finally broke (I think for good, at least I hope) & there is a slight coolness to the air.
Yay baby!
Autumn is so my favorite season!!

These two little "divas" are spending the night, along with big brother, Danny.
That means I got to do crafts & then I braided both their hair (which is much longer now...these pics are old). I told them that when they woke up tomorrow & took out their braids their hair would be curly. Well call me Fredric Fekkai b/c I am now their favorite beautician! LOL
BTW, they are twins. Hard to tell them apart eh?



I am also loving Craigslist.
I made $30 bucks today from it.
Woohoo!
Sold one playpen & one gently used pair of Toddler Black High Top Converse.
What I liked about selling the converse was I got exactly what I paid for them, so in that regard I broke even.
Not so much on the playpen but eh, what can you do.



Americas Next Top Model is back.
Watched the end tonight.
I do not know about this Isis chic.
I think she will make it far but I think only because she is transgender.
She takes pretty photos but model material, not too sure.
Not favs for me yet but check back with me in a few weeks.
Of course, Miss J Alexander is back in full effect this season & I love it.
He is my favorite!!!!!!!!!



On that note..........
Woops out!

Do you ever feel..............

Like you have one of these following you?
I do.
Today especially.

A little bit of happiness found on a roadside stand

Every morning on my way to work I pass a house.
Every morning on my way to work there are 2 little old bitties outside.
In white hats,
white gloves,
skirts.
Tending to their flowers.



Every afternoon when I leave work I pass a house.
Outside the house is a roadside stand.
Where 2 little old bitties sell their flowers in bouquets.
$2 a bouquet.



Today I stopped.
Slapped down a $5 on their "honor" table.
Took 2 bouquets, no change.
One for the Nana.
One for me.



Flowers bring happiness.
Don't you agree?????
So I came home & put them in my Southern Living pitcher & viola! brightened up my dining room!!



Then I preceeded to make 18 cupcakes with "Funfetti" icing for Cheeks to take to daycare tomorrow.
Big man is turning 2 on Saturday.
I don't want to talk about it.
I can't believe it.
Wait!
I can.
Especially tonight when he came over, opened the gate into the kitchen (b/c he can.....guess it's really not doing it's job now)
&
promptly told me to
"TOP!"
or in other words
"STOP!"
I am not sure what I was doing but he didn't like it.
Then he threw a shoe at Aunt Erin's head.
Good times.
Good times.
Thank goodness for the naughty step.
Keep your fingers crossed.....seems to be working.



Woops out!


*Edited to add: When I went to take the cupcakes to the car I noticed the icing had melted off & was laying in the bottom of the containers. Note to self: Do not put cupcakes in Rubbermaid containers & then put lid on to stay overnight.
Sigh.
I am slightly disappointed b/c I really wanted them to look nice for Cheeks 1st official "take a treat to school for your bday"
BUT
on the other hand
I think the oldest kid there is 4 & kids don't care.
Right?

For the Love of all the is Holy

It is hot!


Like Africa Hot.


Good Lord Almighty!


I think I am melting.



1st I want to say thank you for everyone who left me a comment the other day. I am feeling a little better today & just have to realize that I will get through this b/c Heavenly Father will never give you anything you can't handle.



Plus, yesterday, I did a spur of the moment thing. Bobster called to say he was headed to the campground. I really wanted him to come home but he was like well it's easier with the race car, blah, blah, blah. So after I got mad & hung up, I called back & declared...."I'm coming down!" He was flabbergasted. So I packed a quick bag for me & Cheeks & off we headed. Got there about 9. Cheeks fell asleep about 11 or so but not before devouring some cookie cake to make him just that more "jazzed" up! Then his cousins came inside to play. They are 5. Then the bugger got up at 8:30 am.



In case anyone is wondering what campground it is, check this out: Wading Pines.

Woops out!

Tell me

How you would feel?

I have a friend who has a child.
This child will be turning one in the month of Feb.

This friend is someone who I have known for a long time. We are in the same group of friends & socialize often. We belong to dinner club, we have gone to many parties.

She threw me a wedding shower.
I went to her wedding shower....9 days after my exhusband left me.
I attended her wedding, she attended mine.
I went to her baby shower, she was out of town but sent gifts with our friends to mine.
She visited me in the hospital when Cheekers was born, I visited her when her child was born.
She was invited and came to my son's 1st birthday party, even brought dip!
We exchange Christmas presents among the children.
We are friends.

So needless to say, I assumed I would be invited to her child's first b-day.
Just the other day I thought to myself, I wonder when it will be, as I had gotten an invitation to another's friend's child's party, who is a week younger than said friend.

Anyway, while at a playdate yesterday, this subject came up.
Come to find out, this person is only inviting a few choice friends to a small get together at her home for her child's party.
Now, there are 6/7 of us that are friends. 2 got invited. Three of us did not.
Guess which category I fall into?
Yep.
Not invited.

I am slightly offended and a bit hurt.
Our children are extremely close in age...I think 7 mos apart.
When my son sees her child, he gives the child love...which in Cheeks world means he goes cheek to cheek with the other baby & smiles. I think it's cute and I hoped that all of our children would grow up together.
There are 4 of us, who have small children. The other friend's children are about 9ish & 6, so they are a bit older.
Out of the small children, Cheeks falls second oldest. Her child is third oldest.

Anyway, I am a bit hurt that we (my son, my friends) have not been included.
Her home is big enough to accomodate all of us.
I'm not sure why she would feel the need to not include the 3 of us & our children but it feels like a slap.
It feels as if I am good enough to bring shower gifts, welcome baby gifts, happy wedding gifts, xmas gifts but when the birthday rolls around, its time to select who is good enough to come.

It's sad really.
None of our children are holy terrors who would make a scene and I would remove my son if he did (just ask the chic at Kiddie Kandids who was in awe when I said we were done after like two pics b/c my kid was crying).

So that's my post.
My feelings are hurt & I feel as if my tiny family isn't good enough to attend a celebration. I do realize it's her perogative to invite who she wants but it doesn't change the fact that there are hurt feelings.

How would you feel?

**Edited to add:
There is no problem between the two of us.
I saw this person about 2 weeks ago & everything was fine.
I am not the only one that was excluded.