It's a jungle out there

Really it's a jungle in here.
I feel as if the great outdoors has decided to take up living in my humble abode.

As I have stated before, I have a mouse.
Not the kind that lives in sunny Florida & is happy all the time.
The kind that likes to only come out at night & visit.
Ick!

Well yesterday there was some sort of beetle thing in my bathroom.
I waited til it got on the wall.  It was on the ceiling & I don't kill anything above my head for fear it will fall in my hair.
Once it got to where I was comfy with it, I broke out the hairspray & stunned it.
I then waffled it with the canister of Lysol wipes.
Using said wipes I attempted to pick it up.
Til it crunched under my fingers.
Oh.
My.
God!
I do not "do" crunchy.
I eventually got it in the trash but it wasn't my proudest moment.

Now this morning I saunter on into the kitchen & what to my wondering eyes spy?
Ants.
Baby ants
BUT
Ants none the less.
I killed them til I didn't see anymore & then got some ant killy house things.
Wish me luck.

After the ant massacre I go into my living room when I see something green on top of my air conditioner.
I pull back there curtain & there it is.
A grass hopper.

So, like any good mom, I call for my 3 yo to come get it.
He can't reach it & expected me to  pick him up so he could grab it.
Uh uh, not gonna happen.
Could you see it?
He would get it & the sucker would hop into my mouth or ear.
"shiver"
So I did what any good respectable mom would do.
I got my size 10 sneaker & beat the crap out of it.

That's right.
I killed it.

Sorry to all you bug activists but I loathe them.
It was instinctual.
Please forgive me.

I won't tell you what I have in the cabinet waiting for "Micky" to make his appearance.
PETA would be calling me & protesting outside my house.

So tell me, have you ever had the jungle come a callin inside your abode?